He knows the sadness in my eyes, he knows the way I break, the way I bend, the way I change.<\/p>\n

He knows that I want to hide in my bedroom slipped between blush linen sheets, not speaking, naked and warm laying still. Maybe if I lay there long enough I might disappear?<\/p>\n

He knows that in the next moment I want to run, far, far away, where I am a stranger, no one knows my name, no one knows my story….Oh how I want to run.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

He sees the look in my eye when the thing that I gave my heart and soul to I no longer give any fucks about. “I’m conflicted” I say , he says with caring eyes “I know gorgeous, I know”.<\/p>\n

All or nothing. Intense and passionate. Broken or so so strong. Excited, so excited, bored so so bored. These are the months of August and September for me.<\/p>\n

When you look in the mirror what do you see? I see beauty and no beauty , curvy or fat, fresh faced or old, kindness or irritation….what does he see?<\/p>\n

He calls me gorgeous like it’s my name<\/strong>. He sees the crazy, he sees the sane, he sees it all and still chooses me. He knows me.<\/p>\n

What did I do to deserve him, or him me?<\/p>\n

He knows that some days I struggle to breathe and others I breathe life to the world. That my light is small or my light shines like a beacon to the heavens.<\/p>\n

He holds me close and listens to cries of pain, not once but over and over again.<\/p>\n

He knows me, he sees me. He breathes with me til it’s OK again.<\/p>\n

I chose him. I choose him every day. He chose me. He chooses me every day. That is the miracle. That is love.<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Much Love to you all,<\/p>\n

Jazz<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

He knows the sadness in my eyes, he knows the way I break, the way I bend, the way I change. He knows that I want to hide in my bedroom slipped between blush linen sheets, not speaking, naked and warm laying still. Maybe if I lay there long enough I might disappear? He knows […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":644,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"footnotes":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/pexels-photo-261749.jpeg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7WpRm-an","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=643"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":648,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/643\/revisions\/648"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/644"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=643"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=643"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/justwinginit.net.au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=643"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}